A Frenchman, an Englishman, and a New Yorker were captured by a
fierce tribe. The chief comes to them and says, "The bad news is
that now that we've caught you, we're going to kill you, and then use
your skins to build a canoe. The good news is that you get to choose how
you die."
The Frenchman says, "I take ze poison." The chief gives him some
poison, the Frenchman says, "Vive la France!" and drinks it down. The
Englishman says, "A pistol for me, please." The chief gives him a
pistol, he points it at his head, says, "God save the queen!" and blows
his brains out. The New Yorker says, "Gimme a fork." The chief is
puzzled, but he shrugs and gives him a fork. The New Yorker takes the
fork and starts jabbing himself all over --the stomach, the sides, the
chest, everywhere. There's blood gushing out all over, it's horrible.
The chief is appalled, and screams, "What are you doing???"
The New Yorker looks at the chief and says, "So much for your canoe,
asshole!"