* Following my recovery from a heart attack and bypass, Mrs JimJr

didn't want to make love for fear of injuring me. I called the

doctor and asked if he would mind sending me a note that I could

show her, indicating it was safe to resume sex.

Wanting to be helpful, the doctor agreed and said "How do you

want me to address this note ?"

Thinking REAL fast, I replied, "To Whom it May Concern:"

- - - - -

* "It's really amazing," the girl told her wealthy middle-aged

lover, as he was reclining on the bed. "You have a beautiful

head of gray hair, but not a single one in your pubic area."

"Not so amazing as you might think." he replied. "My brain has

to do all the worrying. 'That Guy' hasn't got a care in the world."

- - - - -

* A country club in our area offered a free weekend to prospective

members. Mrs JimJr and I were unable to go, but our neighbor did.

Monday evening, I saw my neighbor outside, so I asked him how

the place was.

He said, "It was great Jimmy. Mixed doubles without a let-up.

And then some idiot had to go and suggest we all play tennis."

- - - - -

* A woman didn't want to embarrass her husband by discussing his

impotence, so she went secretly to his doctor and explained the

problem. He gave a prescription, but the pharmacist who filled

it made an error and the label read 30 drops instead of three.

Two days later the woman is back at the doctor's office. She's

limping and looking generally beat.

"What happened to you ?" the doctor asked.

"Well doc," she replied. "those drops worked too damn good. I'm

afraid now we need an antidote so they can close the coffin."