Click to go back to the joke pageenjoy...and remember IF GOD WANTED US TO DRINK BEER HE WOULD HAVE GIVEN
US STOMACHS!!!!...drink one for me!
WELCOME TO HELL...
ONE DAY, A GUY DIES AND FINDS HIMSELF IN HELL.
AS HE IS
WALLOWING IN DESPAIR, HE HAS HIS FIRST MEETING WITH THE DEVIL.
DEVIL: WHY SO GLUM?
GUY: WHY DO YOU THINK? I'M IN HELL.
DEVIL: HELL'S NOT SO BAD. WE ACTUALLY HAVE A LOT OF FUN DOWN HERE. YOU A DRINKING
MAN?
GUY: SURE I LOVE TO DRINK.
DEVIL: WELL YOURE GONNA LOVE MONDAYS THEN. ON MONDAY'S THATS ALL WE DO. DRINK,
DRINK, DRINK. WHISKEY, TEQUILA, GUINNESS, WINE COOLERS, DIET TAB... WE DRINK UNTIL
WE THROW UP AND THEN WE DRINK SOME MORE.
GUY: GEE, THAT SOUNDS GREAT.
DEVIL: YOU A SMOKER?
GUY: YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT.
DEVIL: ALL RIGHT! YOURE GONNA LOVE TUESDAYS. WE GET THE FINEST CIGARS FROM
AROUND THE WORLD AND SMOKE OUR LUNGS OUT. IF YOU GET
CANCER IT'S OK, YOU'RE ALREADY DEAD!
GUY: NO WAY!
DEVIL: I BET YOU LIKE TO GAMBLE.
GUY: YES, AS A MATTER OF FACT I DO.
DEVIL: GOOD, BECAUSE WEDNESDAY IS GAMBLING DAY. CRAPS, BLACKJACK, HORSE RACES, YOU
NAME IT. WE'VE EVEN OPENED UP A PAI GOW POKER TABLE.
GUY: HMMM, I'VE NEVER PLAYED PAI GOW BEFORE...
DEVIL: WELL NOW YOU CAN. YOU LIKE TO DO DRUGS?
GUY: YES, I LOVE DRUGS! YOU DON'T MEAN...
DEVIL: THATS RIGHT! THURSDAY IS DRUG DAY. HELP YOURSELF TO A BIG BOWL
OF CRACK. SMOKE A DOOBIE THE SIZE OF YOUR HEAD. YOU CAN DO ALL THE
DRUGS YOU WANT. IF YOU OVERDOSE? ITS OKAY! YOU'RE ALREADY DEAD!!
GUY: YES! I NEVER REALIZED THAT HELL WAS SUCH A SWINGING PLACE!!
DEVIL: SO... ARE YOU GAY?
GUY: UH, NO.
DEVIL: OOOOH (GRIMACES) , YOU ARE GONNA HATE FRIDAYS!!!!